Friday, November 11, 2005

Little Known Facts About Vin Diesel

  • There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Vin Diesel allows to live.
  • If you rearrange the letters in Vin Diesel it reveals his credo: "I End Lives."
  • Vin Diesel can win a game of Monopoly without owning any property.
  • When Vin Diesel goes to donate blood, he declines the syringe, and instead requests a hand gun and a bucket.
  • There is no "I" in team. There are two "I"s in Vin Diesel. Screw you, team.
  • In an average living room there are 1,242 objects Vin Diesel could use to kill you, including the room itself.
  • Vin Diesel has always been able to find Waldo, except for one time. He found himself stumped on the last page of Where's Waldo Now?, not being able to find the Waldo without a shoe. He threw the book down and screamed, "This SUCKS!" They're all wearing shoes." He then proceeded to eat the book and exclaim, "IF I CAN'T FIND WALDO, THEN NO ONE CAN!" The book he ate belonged to a child that he had borrowed it from. The child began to cry and Vin ate him for good measure. The incident has since been refered to as Christmas.
  • Vin Diesel is the reason why Waldo is hiding.
  • Vin Diesel once beat Super Mario Bros 3 without even touching his Nintendo controller. He just yelled at his TV in between bites of his "Filet of Child" sandwich, and the game beat itself out of fear.
  • Vin Diesel is the only man to ever defeat a brick wall in a game of tennis.
  • When Vin Diesel jumps into a body of water, he doesn't get wet. The water gets Vin instead.
  • Vin Diesel can set ants on fire with a magnifying glass. At night.
  • It takes 14 puppeteers to make Vin Diesel smile, but only 2 to make him destroy an orphanage.
  • On his birthday, Vin Diesel randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
  • Vin Diesel can divide by zero.
  • You are what you eat. That is why Vin Diesel's diet consists entirely of bricks, steel, and the tears of small children.
  • Not only was Vin Diesel the first to shoot a baby out of a cannon, he was the first to eat a high velocity baby shot out of a cannon.


Raven said...

divide by zero......gah nnnoooooooooooooooooooooo

That furry beast guy of death said...

O_O Oh... my... god.... I think I just died like 5 times over... Damn you ROFLMAOBBQ

BanannaGirl said...

That.....That.....That was AWSOME!

Beast. Furry Death Beast. said...

>.> *cough* *awesome* *Anna can't spell* *cough*

Scott said...

why are your rolling around in BBQ Anna?

Anonymous said...

0/0 I win

Raven said...

Donovan, I think there is a lack of CHOCOLATE COVERED ROOSTERS on your blog i would suggest fixing that little problem.

P.S. scott.... you crazy

BanannaGirl said...

Well to answer your question...
Along with being buttery, I am also a little spicy.